My STELLAR Experience

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Hey paddy, Are you caving in unto peer pressure? Do you feel alone? Are you tired of been insulted? Wait a minutes raise your should and tell yourself I am the best of my kind. After me there can never be another me.

This fateful day, I had gone to another church with a friend on a Sunday morning. We got in at 55 minutes to the end of a 3 hours service. I came because the church was helping out with the national ID card and I felt this was the best opportunity. At the end of the service I got captured for the National ID and time to go home. I went down stair and I met 2 other boys with my friend and 2 girls talking about going to Loko’s (not real name) to go cook spaghetti, then a short, round, fair girl came by the sales stand by us to buy Shawarma, my fiends started throwing banter that no one can approach her. I took the challenge and went towards her, we had a very smooth 10 minutes chat and eventually said goodbye. My friends started hailing and my head started swelling. She told me her name but I can’t even recall at this time. I had perfected my art of approaching a lady since I was 19.

The excitement in the air made me agree as the hero to go to Loko’s house, this was the location were God never followed me to.

In a few moment we got to Loko’s house there was loud music, and the girls started cooking spaghetti we bought earlier with cooking ingredients. In another few minute everyone was sipping alcohol and then the girls started shaking their buttocks to the loud music.

Then Loko took a girl to another room, I did not have an idea of what was happening, and while he was yet to be back his girlfriend came in to pay a surprise visit. I was try to calm her down with YK (boy) when 1 other boy came in. This guy and one of the boy took their turn to go into the room where Loko emerged from while we were begging Toyo(Loko’s girlfriend). Then I felt Loko put his hand in my pocket and dropped something in my pocket and said it is your turn.

I was curious, I wanted to know what was going on the room, I went in and met this other girl naked and half drunk, I was shocked. I put my hand in my pocket and saw 2 condoms. I knew I was far away from the umbrella of God. I immediately developed speech disorder, I knew she was half drunk and I should never take advantage of her. She was all over me in a second saying she love me, kissing and massaging me, I started muttering some words into her ear, she did not pay attention. I was in a deep mess and the dungeon of the devil. I did not know what to say, I was confused. Then I said, I can’t have sex with you. She said, why? I said, I am doing some 7 days spiritual protection activities as I work around a politician and will need to fortify myself for the coming election. To my amazement, she heard that and started wearing her clothes. She then replied, will you make money out of this? I said yes. Then she said, I hope you will give me some money? In microseconds I said YES.

She said, Just be going. It was not as as easy as written. In 30 minutes when she came out of the room, she has gotten herself fully drunk and was shouting my name. My friends started saying what did I do to her, she was closing her eye and was behaving like a near death patient. My so called friends start saying how could i have stayed 1 hour? of which I have no idea. The whole blame was on me. They told me to report myself to the police if she died. They told me I am about to be a murderer. They never knew I did not do anything but in the middle of this she was still calling my name. We got garri and Fed her. Then after 5 hours sleep she was back to normal. I kept on checking on her pulse to see if she was till breathing. It was worse 5 hours of my life. Egypt I went.

I was rescued by the hand of last miracle, I was a great lesson of no friend like Jesus. He is the only one that can stand by you in trouble. There are places that God’s eyes can see but God’s hand can’t rescue. The bible says if the edge be broken the serpent bites. Beware of dogs. Jesus is loves you.

If your virginity is never important, why is does the devil wants it? If marriage is not good, why is the devil waging war against it? You will be tested or tempted but do not be perturbed you already won the battle. He will always make a way. I failed on all steps that led me to that room but I survived. It has not been easy but his grace is enough for me.

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Did God really say don’t have SEX?

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June 9th is world virginity day, yay! This year before I start sharing my 365 experiences with you lets talk about God’s plan for us pertaining SEX.
This is a question many of us has asked a particular time of our life. Did God really say don’t have SEX? If he did not want us to have sex why did he create the thirst for sex in us as humans? If I have sex what would happen? Those who say don’t have sex didn’t they have sex while they were younger? Will God leave all the problems in life and now be so concerned with having sex?
Now 1Cor 7:2-6 spoke about this issues, please if you have a bible read MSG and AMP version. In the beginning God created man in his own image and likeness. He wanted man to have fellowship with him, he wanted man to be like himself but he found a flaw to this his creation. This flaw was man being alone not lonely(another talk for another day), man had the vertical relationship but did not have the horizontal relationship like other animals who were created in twos. God created a help meet for man for the purpose of COMPANIONSHIP. Companionship another word for fellowship . It is in this institution that God ordained marriage. God never said don’t have sex but have it in the confines of marriage. God never said if you have sex you will have disease but STIs are consequences of SEX. God never said if you have sex you will die but if you have sex outside of marriage your spirit man is dead.
When you are hungry can you eat just anything including faeces or garbage? If not then God has given you a special place in his heart to as a Royal priesthood, holy nation to do things that are honourable. You are not an animal but God’s image. Ye are god’s.
If you have made a mistake God does not hate you. Don’t let anyone make you look filthy. God loves you and wants you. He gave himself for you and nothing will make him hate you. God does not hate you but the sinful act you engage in.
Finally are you lost, do you know you are battling with guilt, are you unsure of your eternity, are you seeking a way out of your addiction, are you tired of your current situation, do you seek peace for your soul? Now is the time, Let pray with sincerity of heart confessing and forsaking our iniquity, ask Jesus to come into your life and be your personal Lord and Saviour. Am glad you are a part of a big family of God today. I love you. Feel free to comment below.
Up next: my STELLAR experience

Big Brother Naija: Leadership lessons gleaned from Khloe

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It has been three weeks of big brother Naija season 3 titled; Double Wahala. The house mate has made the competition house look like a love and romantic nest. Despite all the negative there are lots of positive lesson to glean from this reality show as Nigerian and Africans. Some of these leadership lessons are;

Listen: Khloe (officially Queen Koko Da Silva) was not a good listener. She was too loud and noisy as the Average Nigerian politician. She was not calm; she exhibits a pure character of a sanguine leader. She knows how to talk to her followers about what she expected of them. How she expected the house to be but did not do enough to listen to her fellow housemates like Tobi Bakre. Tobi Bakre was a good listener. He did not listen to respond but listened to understand. Most of the girls loves Tobi for been a listener and a gardener(care-taker). Khloe was too dramatic, she was the loud and lousy.

Team player: Queen Koko Da Silva; Khloe was good in initiating a good plan but did not do well in getting the buy-in of all her team. She had a good idea to make the Housemates to talk about entrepreneurship but slipped while waking Dee-One from his sleep. She would have done well if she had delegated Vandora to wake Dee-One from his sleep. Vandora would have been able to wake him up without a uproar. In leadership the buy-in of majority of your team is very important. Leadership is not about the leader but about the leader and followers.

One of defining choice of a leader is choice of partner and/or team.

Attitude: Charles Swindoll said, “The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company…a church….a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past…we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude…I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you…we are in charge of our attitudes.” ― Charles R Swindoll

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Khloe was indiscipline and this was the single bullet that disqualified her from the house. She loose her temper easily and at free will. Her case was like Alexandra the great who conquered the world but did not conquered himself. During her tenure the housemates won the wager for the first time which Tobi Bakre failed to do. She won the wager but was disqualified from the house despite her immunity. She was the custodian of the grunde norm. It was her primary assignment as Head of House to keep sanity in the house but she failed in her primary assignment. I would not blame KBrule for whatever happened. As a leadership expert, I know looking at Khloe’s body language yesterday she felt she was sent packing because of Kbrule but leadership is huge RESPONSIBILITY. Khloe wanted 45 million Naira but her attitude kicked her out of contention. This singular scenario justifies Charles Swindoll’s quote. Dear reader, your attitude is more important than MONEY.

Many young people who are watching Big Brother Naija and are in the house see themselves as the leaders of tomorrow but they lack the simple understanding of leadership. This reality show has opened our eye to our indiscipline, low self-esteem, lack of value and many more. The positive is that we are intelligent, energetic, passionate, talented and full of a lot of ideas. If all you are watching is the nude and immoral side, it is time to turn the coin and see how you can improve your life from this big reality show.

LOVE LETTER TO HADASSAH

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Dear Hadassah,

My charming enigma of beauty, outstanding royalty in attitude, the touch of excellence. Magnetic and alluring to behold. The medicine to my craze. An ardent and addicted God-lover. My Queen, your king loves you. I pray you love me.

Yes, this is my confession of my imperfect perfection. Your king is not asking you put up with his nonsense but the brokenness that beautifies him. It is the way of eagles to fly alone. Many walk, few run and eagles fly alone. Be sure I want to spend my life with you under the refuge of THE ROCK.

I am not a party freak. The weird thing is I love dancing, singing, eating and gisting. I love rap music and hymns. I don’t love crowd. Crowd scares me when it is a weird party. I manage to blend in a few time but I end up with headache. You will be amazed when you see me dancing and you are in for a big competition on wedding day. I dislike party and aso-ebi, not that they are bad but they are just not my thing. I grew up knowing I dislike it. I am open to go to a few parties with you but not always.

Treasure, I am not perfect o. I joy in deep thought. Critical thinking is my obsession. I don’t fall into this always but I do seldom. When I do I soliloquize. I mutter words. I love been left alone. I retract and sleek away into solitude. This is a time of pain and travail to birth new ideas and solutions. It really does not last long but very dangerous to nag at this period. I abhor and detest it. This is the height of insensitivity to me. This time all I deserve from you is food, chocolate, a surprise peck or short kiss, a path on the back and the energizing word “I LOVE YOU”.

Let me apologize for all my wrong before time. Hadas, when am in traffic, at work or even in sleep I could receive a love poem all about you. Don’t be annoy if your mirror, make-up box, dressing table or refrigerator are defaced with my love poems sticky note in all color shades. I could be really crazy to drive home during working hours only to quickly stick a poem for you before you come back home. Please be accommodating to allow me own the kitchen with you when I am available. Our kitchen is the place to feed the nation and foreplay room. I am communal and love privacy. Ahhh, now you wonder how possible. I joy in the people that surrounds me and like them around especially if they got positive energy but I sleek away a few time to give “BIRTH”. It is the way of eagles to live with a partner till death and so I will.

It is the way of eagles to be singly focused. Don’t mind my obsession about you. I already started displaying it before your arrival, I don’t intend to stop. I am not good at giving gift but I will do my best to pull few surprises. Please look beyond the gift into the heart of giving.

I am not looking for you; I am looking for God in you. I am sure if you love God you will love me. Give all of you to God. Verily, verily I say to you, no prayer can make me ask you on a first date if I catch a glimpse of heavy make-up, chain on your leg, tattoo of me, cross, Jesus or anything on your body, fixing of eye-lashes and anything that is over doing. Godliness is not hidden; it will always appear in our dressing. It is simple to catch my attention. It is simple simply excellence. Let me repeat your total submission and love to God is the key to my love. Please just be you, I already love you and promise to always do.

I am a man of many flaws and mistakes but I have asked God for a large heart for you. I am not immortal but supernatural. I love you already without your sight. I am impressed by your deep love for God, strong ethic for work, and effectual prayer life. You are all I crave, desire and want. Tobi love you big big. You are my heartbeat.

 

Your King.

Valentine Special: What is love?

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What is love? Can you define love? I am sure I have heard love over 1 million times since I was born. I have seen people make love to themselves but still end up divorced. I have seen two people in love hate themselves. They say love is an emotional feeling. Yes, I used to believe that but today I have something different to share with you.

If love is a feeling, then it becomes very easy for our feelings to change because our mind where emotion seat has capacity to be happy and sad, confused and convinced, and likewise love and hate. It is like a changeover switch that can move anytime situation or environment changes. It is a thermometer. If love is based on feeling, then the environment is a very important factor in falling into and falling out of love. Love or hate could be based on friends, education, social status, money, looks, and etc. These things are ephemeral. They are perishing, surface and temporal.

I am of the opinion that love is a spirit not feeling. It is constant. It cannot be separated. It does not switch-over. It is a thermostat that rather influence its environment to flow with it. It is a powerful energy that does not look at physical environment, rather it is piercing into the inner mind of the other to see deep and eternal beauty of the other. It is the singular thing that will make you receive a heart of giving rather than the gift. The gift may be less expensive but you will appreciate it like gold.   Love is giving what the receiver cannot pay back. Love is giving and forgiving. If he or she cannot forgive then they aren’t loving but this should not be a reason why you should always misbehave. We love receiving gift but it is hard to forgive. Forgiving is a greater proof of love. ‘

One of the test of love of eagles is to pick a leave drops it into the wind while flying. The other partner dives down into the wind to pick the leave and bring it up to the other partner. This is a way to test loyalty. Everyone can love in calm and splendid time. It is easy to love in comfort, how about in challenges(wind) will your partner be loyal and forgiving?

Love is never one way, it is two ways, it is giving and forgiving, it is a rose of flower full with thorn because of the destroyer. It is a full spirit in human being that cannot be unchanging, immortal and divine. It is the giver of life and the source of all. You cannot give sacrificial love without Him. He gave and forgave you allow Jesus into your life. You will have the capacity to love extravagantly because love is a spirit. The love of God is shed abroad through the Holy Ghost in us. We are a receiver and transmitter of radio wave. God loves you. I love you. Go and love on the world.

EQUALITY OR EQUITY…FEMINISM OR HUMANITY?

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I am a keen lover of the female gender. It is great delight to have them around as I am the only male in my family since my father died. I am unapologetic about my support for the female gender. I will always support the aspiration of women’s goal and aspiration.

Women are not weaklings, they are not foolish, they don’t whine. They are wise, strong and pillar of the society. They hold an important office in the growth and development of a nation. They are the custodian of values and morals. Woman; a teacher and shaper of destiny. No real man will pride himself in physically assaulting a female. No real man will abuse a woman. A matured man protects, tend and care for the woman gender. The strength of Man is in using our strength to cover up for the woman’s weakness not showcasing it.

My deep concern is when a woman begins to see herself as less. When a woman wants to be equal to the status and stature of a man using the world equality? Are we in a competition? Didn’t the maker made us help meet (collaborators)? Why then the competition for equality when you are? You don’t fight to be what you are because you are?

Anybody who have to say you don’t know who I am before you know who they are was nobody- Pastor Sam Adeyemi

Why the tussle, struggle and hassle. You are a woman, celebrate your uniqueness and stop fighting with the male gender like he is a gladiator. Stop speaking for yourself alone and expecting a man to support, rather speak for the oppressed men, children and women on the street. We were created in different capacity, male and female he created them…Please dear Queen celebrate your womanhood with a deep seen of humanity. You can never be a man; no matter how you try God will never promote you to the position of a man and vice versa.

Many ideologies have destroyed the family and society. A society where women expect merit even when they don’t merit it. A world where women can misbehave without consequences but man cannot. A world where been rude to husband is seen as romantic.

Let’s turn to statistics: Do you know 1/3 male are sexually harassed by female worldwide at work place? Do you know globally there are more tendencies a boy is abuse without help than a girl? Do you know women are crueler to women than men? Do you know it is likely a female gets help or favor under same condition than a male? Do you 2 out of 5 persons that has gone through domestic violence is male?

Is this equality? I am an advocate of gender equity. I love women; I will never beat or physically abuse a woman. I will always accord the respect a woman is due to her. If I wrong a woman I will be humble enough to apologize sincerely and all this I have always done.

Women must begin to dignify themselves than mere talk. All ye feminist, when was the last time you stood up in a bus for a pregnant or nursing mother to sit? A man is expected to stand up right? Shake my head… I think all feminist should think humanity first before feminism. Women stop looking for sympathy rather seek empathy. You are not weak…infact after the bible had called you week vessels, it called you sons. What an upgrade!

I remember a celebrity feminist pulled up media stunt with Femi Anikulapo-Kuti’s children. If you are truly a feminist you must value children. If not feminist is rubbish. Feminism without a respect for your own body and nakedness is stupidity. I remember a feminist snatched her friend’s husband. Feminist that does not respect fellow feminist is waste of time. I know lots of feminist who are rude to the leadership of their husbands at home because they are equal. This is rebellion against God. Any feminist without respect for God’s command is foolishness.

I hope women’s selfishness, being self-centered, and arrogance are not been labeled FEMINISM. Killing INEQUALITY with another INEQUALITY IS FOOLISHNESS. In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth…And God said come let us create MAN in our own IMAGE and likeness(Man is God’s image but can never be GOD)…Come let’s make him an help meet(WHY DO WOMEN WANT TO BE MEN?)…She shall be called Woman (WOMB-MAN not WOE-MAN) for out of me she was brought forth. Women you are beautiful, unique and whole, celebrate your uniqueness.

KONJI NAH BASTARD…LIBIDO IS BLIND.

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As a young Christian, you have heard  the sermon of Joseph(the prime minister) and Mary(the mother of Jesus), how they remained chaste and God blessed them in return. You also want God’s blessing, so you decided you were going to live a chaste life like they did.

Good, the journey started as a child but the real battle started as a teenager, your body started calling for what you cannot give it. It is hungry like your stomach, it desires food and its food is SEX. Can anyone in the bid to fill hunger, eat poison. Having sex outside marriage is poison! When we eat and get satisfied, does that eliminate hunger in future, NO! Alas! Having sex is the step to having another sex.

My journey thus far was inspired by my mother and my religious background. I had friends who were all sexually active. I aided them in getting their victim but refused to act like them. I knew all the technique but was not interested in defiling myself. Yes I did not, but I am guilty of accomplice. Ask my friend, will you marry any of the girls you had sex with? The answer is a blatant NO! Hey Sis and Bro, Sex will not make him/her love you more, it is a big lie.

For me, it has been rough, I do not even know how I stumbled to be here still standing. Not that I have never tried to but I have always wanted a future so different and outstanding.

I eventually found someone I love deeply after God’s leading. When i say God’s leading, i know what i am saying. She is cute, loving, caring, intelligent and cynosure of all eye.  She is a Christian, tongue speaking, holy ghost filled but we put ourselves in a very tight situation, we did everything that precede sex but did not have sex.  Mind you, everything that precedes sex is SIN, if you are not married. Why are you pouring fuel in the engine you do not want to start. Rather than our love to get stronger, today we are way apart. That is what SIN and premarital sex can do to even people who genuinely love each other. I have always thought I will get stronger as I get older. That is not the case; rather the temptation is more frequent and harder. It has become tougher and daunting.

I honestly regret every action behind those close doors, I am not proud of it, but grace kept me standing. Hey, you justify that kissing, smooching, fingering is no SEX, you are a bloody liar. Every activity that leads to sex is sex. I repeat, why are you pouring fuel in the engine you do not have intent to start?

God’s love is unchanging, he desire we present our body a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to him…which is our only reasonable service. The result of my action was guilt, depression, sadness, fear and most of all a separation from my love.

Dear, why are you drinking poison every day in the form of premarital sex? Why are you killing yourself and saying it is enjoyment. Premarital sex kills.

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I have renewed my vow and now taking it again. In between 3-5 years, I will get married, I will walk down the aisle with my Queen, I will wait patiently for her. She is priceless, her worth more than rubies, the glory of her husband, the keeper of her home, she overcome her enemies at the city gate, the explanation of God’s beauty. The road has not been easy but I am willing by God’s grace to cross the finish line.

If you have messed up, he loves you, if you have not yet messed up but you are not born again, please give your life to                 Jesus as your Lord and savior.    Jesus loves you so much.